Bringing Sexy Back!
Over the last few months we’ve discussed intimate topics like peeing, pooping and childbirth. I sincerely thank you for sticking around to learn more, and I love the messages I receive each month about how helpful these newsletters have been.
So keeping on theme, today we’re talking about the most intimate pelvic health topic of them all…SEX! Many of my patients joke that I give them the sex talk they wish they had gotten back in the day. And lucky for you, that’s what we we'll be doing today, plus I’ll let you in on how a pelvic floor physical therapist treats dyspareunia (dis-pur-oo-nee-ah), which is the medical term for pain with sex.
3 Sexy Tips for ALL Pelvic Floors
First, whether you’re experiencing painful intercourse or not, everyone can benefit from these tips.
🧴 Tip #1 - Lube!
Lube isn’t just a nice-to-have—it’s essential. Better glide means less pain, increased pleasure, and more positive sexual experiences. Who doesn’t want that!? And did you know that there are 3 types? If not, you’re in the majority.
Check out the chart below to learn important details about each. I recommend trying different types to see what you like. The brands I recommend to my patients are: Good Clean Love, Slippery Stuff, Sliquid, CocoNu, and Aureum.
✌️ Tip #2 - Good Vibes!
Vibration actually promotes muscle relaxation and blood flow making it a game-changer for more enjoyable sex. And did you know that 70% of women need clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm? This is another important reason why I recommend experimenting with vibration for solo and partnered intimacy.
During one of my recent couples' appointments (I love doing these) the husband commented, “This makes a lot of sense. It’s like a gentle version of a Theragun, but for down there, and with some extra bonus features.” He nailed it! So no need to feel weird about trying a vibrator, your pelvic floor PT says it’s good for you! If you don’t know where to start, my favorite brands are Tabu & Dame.
Full disclosure, I recently became a medical advisor to Tabu and absolutely love their pelvic health-focused approach.
🛌 Tip #3 - Pillows!
Using pillows under your pelvis and/or thighs can put your body in a better position to reduce hip and pelvic floor tension allowing for better depth control and relaxation. Pillows can help in nearly any position, so experiment and see what works best. I recommend memory foam types (I love a good 2 pack deal from Costco!) as well as wedge-style pillows like the Prim or Pillo.
💻 Try my self-paced, online programs for stopping leaks, pelvic floor birth prep and returning to exercise postpartum!
Dyspareunia: Decoding the Discomfort
So now that we got the fun stuff out of the way, let’s talk dyspareunia. 3 in 4 women will experience painful intercourse at some point in their lives. So why does painful intercourse happen and, more importantly, what can you do about it?
🪢 Pelvic Floor Muscle Tightness
Just like any other muscle, the pelvic floor can become too tight, leading to discomfort. Tightness can be a sign that a muscle is working overtime to make up for another muscle that isn’t doing its job well. In this case, weak hip muscles are often a big contributor, since they work closely with the pelvic floor muscles.
Solution - No, it’s not kegels. You need to strengthen your hips and work on your breathing! Start with this 3-part routine, or try my Postpartum Strength Program for a more comprehensive plan.
🤕 Scar Tissue
In the US, 2 in 3 births are delivered vaginally, and nearly 40% of mothers will sustain a significant tear to their pelvic floor. Scar tissue that develops from a tear can impair flexibility of the pelvic floor and surrounding tissues, causing discomfort during intercourse.
Solution - Massage the scar tissue with your hand or a vibrator to help restore flexibility and teach your brain that it's OK to allow these areas to stretch again. Check out my YouTube tutorial.
🪫 Low Estrogen
Estrogen plays a vital role in maintaining our pelvic health. Low estrogen levels can cause vaginal dryness and thinning of the vaginal walls which leads to painful sex. This is common during early postpartum, breastfeeding, peri/menopause, and after procedures like hysterectomies and estrogen suppressing cancer treatments.
Solution - Topical estrogen! You can get a prescription for a cream or vaginal suppository. My patients have seen great results, but not all physicians will suggest this, you may have to ask directly or find a doctor that specializes in menopause and/or sexual health.
And as always, if you’re experiencing pain with sex, the best solution is to get a pelvic pro on your healthcare team. Know that pelvic floor physical therapists are uniquely trained to help you get your sexy back! Connect with one near you.
Thanks for Reading! Please forward this newsletter to a friend and help spread the word on pelvic health! Questions, comments, requests for future newsletters? Send an email to info@pelvicsavvy.com.
Your pelvic health matters,
Dr. Chris
Find me on Instagram & YouTube
I want you to have the knowledge & tools to make great health choices for yourself. Ideas shared in this blog do not constitute medical advice.
